Coronavirus and My Anxiety

My wife and I have been screening for the past 6 weeks, during coronavirus, because my wife is medically vulnerable, and I suspect on the border of highly vulnerable. The last 6 weeks have been the best. I don’t have to go out, everyone is working remotely, we have no fixed appointments or commitments. I don’t have to go to the shops, I can’t ride my bike or walk the dog. I am not allowed out!!!

I can get on with my work and do things around the house, look after my wife, read, play Sudoku, and do what I want, with no pressure to see anyone or go out. It is wonderful. My bowels have never been better (I have Ulcerative Colitis) and I realize that my bowel difficulties (frequency) in the morning are because of my anxiety.

I still feel I am being watched and judged and feel under pressure to get up and do things in the morning. Weekends are good as that pressure drops, I now get a paper delivered on Sunday and enjoy reading that and drinking tea. The supermarket is delivering our groceries, we have a milkman and the kids go to the chemist for us.

I don’t have to go out and visit people, I can be at home and feel safe. I am not (putting myself) under pressure to goon holiday, to visit family or go elsewhere. I can’t take my wife out.

I just feel so less anxious, able to read and bowels are good.

Sundays statement by the government caused me to worry about how much thhe would relax movement and going out etc. I am now increasingly worrying that suggested restrictions and our choice of screening will come to an end. I want to carry on like this. I feel better – so much less pain and bad thoughts.

Don’t get me wrong coronavirus is terrible and the amount of death across the world is horrific, but not being able to go out makes me feel much better.

What am I going to do when coronavirus goes away?

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